In my next life I want to live my life backwards.

You start out dead and get that out of the way. Then you wake up in an old folk’s home, feeling better every day. You get kicked out for being too healthy, go collect your pension, and then when you start work, you get a gold watch and a party on your first day. You work for 40 years until you are young enough to enjoy your retirement.

You party, drink alcohol, and are generally promiscuous, then you are ready for school. You then go to primary school, you become a kid, you play. You have no responsibilities, you become a baby until you are born. And then you spend your last 9 months floating in luxurious spa-like conditions with central heating and room service and then Voila! You finish off as an orgasm!

Advice of the day for all the horny men out there :
“Sex is the consolation you have when you can’t have love…”